The Writing Of A Posting
This was started near the end of March and as per usual, I didn't have a clue about what to write. So, I just started typing. At that time, I was ahead of this blog posting game and had the luxury of time. Yet, I felt the need to start working on this posting. Crazy, I know! In my short career as a blog writer I have never started so early on a posting. Again crazy, I know! But never fear my friends, this luxury of time, well, it will not last the year.
I do my writing on an iPad, longhand while typing with one finger. My printed handwriting is so bad I can't even read at times. I start mostly by entering many ideas or thoughts in short, incomplete sentences. Then, over the course of writing some are fleshed out, becoming whole paragraphs while others get joined together creating the core of a paragraph. Cut and paste and re-paste...I live and die by the paste buffer.
I have always had this romantic vision of being a writer. Simply sitting next to an open window on the second story of a bar or restaurant with a diet Coke, hidden away in one of the dimly lit corners, while observing the activity on a street below or the comings and goings inside. Living that way in Florida or on the coast of Alabama or Texas. That life will have to wait, right now I'm very content just writing at home or on the third floor Florida condo on its lanai with it's windows open and a fountain raining in the background, when it is working.
During our last Florida trip, I was able to pound out a posting that might be published soon after our return. In addition, two more were mostly completed. Usually it takes weeks just getting one to the point where the lovely Kath can proof it. She says I'm getting better, I think she is blinded by love. Once she is done, it is checked over a few more times before I'm ready to push it out of the nest for all the world to read. I can play with the writing forever. My frame of mind changes every day, and a thought or point that sounded great Tuesday could get ripped apart Friday.
Then there are all the second guessing questions and pressures I put myself though. Why do I do this? Simple answer— because I'm me! If I don't torment myself over the little things, who will? I do my best speaking in my head. A partial list of what I put myself though:
What do I want to say in this posting? Maybe I'll make it into a Seinfeld TV episode, it really will be about nothing. I'm great at that, rambling on and on, trying to make myself sound knowledgable.
Then, after running in circles for a while, I'll move on to more important questions. Should this posting be humorous? Can I do that? Naaaa. OK then maybe I'll take a serious tack. I can seem serious if I ramble on for a while, losing the reader after only a few paragraphs. They will think I know what I'm talking about because they can't understand it. Much like reading a book of laws, thus causing the eyes to glaze over.
Next, my lack of confidence starts playing out. Will I be able to think outside the box? Can I truly think outside the box? Do I need to think outside the box? Where did the box come from and where did I put those box cutters anyway?
Then, since the posting will become part of a photograph web site, I'll start to wonder if I should only write about photography. Or maybe I'll just mix it up this time talking more about me. My thoughts? My observations? But who in their right mind want to read that, I know not me!
Once I have everything written down and the way I want it, or at least how I think I want it to go, the line "What to leave in, what to leave out" from the Bob Seger song "Against The Wind" starts to echo in my head.
Uggg....that is me being me.
Jumping along the time/space continuum, a time has been reached, the one to which this posting must be finished up. Have it proofed, poked and prodded one last time then published for a world hungry to read and review. I mean how long can one work on something like this before either deleting it, creating a masterpiece or just plan screwing it up? By now I have become too emotionally involved to know, so blinded by a writer's love to rationally think otherwise of its pure greatness, so committed to its posting no matter the quality of the writing. So, I say to all gathered around a monitor, this posting will happen my friends...it will happen! And on that flaky note I'll leave you to enjoy and decide for yourself if it should have happened.